I'm on vacation in San Francisco and it's lovely here. I was piggybacking off a trip to the Bay Area to visit my brother who ironically works for a major tech company but is not a technical person like me, and I figured if I came all this way, I should get an airbnb and spend a few days in SF as well.
I don't intend to leave NYC, but if I ever did, it might be for SF. Planning on heading out in 30min or so to start my day, no time to say anything too substantive about it, but this has been very refreshing and validating and I really needed this for various personal reasons I may or may not elaborate on in the comments or on the server after I'm home.
I had intended to set MRD Vol.2 in SF in much the same way that MRD Vol.1 was set in NYC, and at least now I have a little more context for the physicality and noosphere of the place.
In part because my MRD Vol.2 Campaign got put on pause due to scheduling reasons, and in part because I was getting burnt out, I had kind of given up on ever publishing MRD Vol.2, despite the fact that I genuinely believe (and received some trustworthy feedback) that it has the potential to be a better game, and I'm a better game designer now than I was when I wrote the first book.
I've been feeling a little creatively burnt out and ambivalent about RPG stuff. I had a little burst with the "Superhero Project" and with some of that Elements stuff, but just have not been feeling connected or engaged creatively or with writing or RPGs, and maybe this is just the vacation talking, but I really hope to turn that around.
The second printing of MRD Vol.1 on Exalted Funeral is coming out soon. I don't want to overcommit myself, but I hope I can make MRD Vol.2, or maybe I should kill my darling and focus on the "Superhero Project" or something else? I don't know, but being here makes me want to do MRD Vol.2 properly for the first time in a long time, so at least for now there's that.
PS I generally don't take photos almost as a rule, but my airbnb has a really awesome view of the city from the roof so I will take photos later just from there and update this post with them so keep an eye out ;)! If I take photos of the city, you can see someone else's photos of the same thing and they will be better, but the only photos you'll see from this roof are from me or the guy who lives here (he's a really nice guy, if you ever want to airbnb in SF I'd recommend him!) so at least even if I take bad photos there, they'll be unique.
EDIT: Here are those photos
We all go through creative slumps ofc and it's not like we can switch em off or anything but imo your recent work has been killer. I mean, I'd also like to see MRD Vol.2 but even if you went all in on other projects, I wouldn't complain. Glad you're enjoying the city, that's an awesome view. See anything particularly cool?
ReplyDeleteDude I saw more in like ~4 days than probably half the people who live here lol. I tried to do a mix of some touristy stuff, but also trying to do the kinds of things I'd do if I lived here, similar to how I've learned to experience the different neighborhoods in NYC over the years.
DeleteI've only been to San Francisco a couple of times, but I enjoyed my time there. Glad you are enjoying yours.
ReplyDeleteWhen I run up against a creative wall, I switch up content or tone, or sometimes switch to a different art altogether (from writing to music or visual art for example). This can be helpful.
But: I think it's also natural that we have times when there's just not much in there for us, and usually when I force something at those times I am unhappy with the final result. I tend to be kind of hard on myself when I'm not "producing" creatively in some way, but I think in part that comes from cultural indoctrination (the whole of our society and many others basically tells us nonstop that we are not worth anything unless we are productive) and part personal and existential fears about what my "purpose" is or if indeed I have one at all.
I've been working on letting those fears go. In an exchange with Enziramire the other day he said this to me and it was exactly the right time for me to hear it, so I'd like to pass it on:
"The virtues of the useless life are known to the wise of all times and lands."
I have broadly been re-examining that whole "productivity lifestyle" thing, there's probably some of that here. Some of it is also just like general life/motivational type issues I've been struggling with lately, like after 10 years of pretty consistently weightlifting, I have not done so in several months, and for no necessary reason. It's also tricky because I'm trying to reprioritize a little bit, like doing more travel for instance ;), or working on other aspects of my personal life, and there's just not enough time for everything :/.
DeleteBut also, for as much awesome stuff as there still is going on right now, it also seems like maybe the indie RPG market is a bit oversaturated at the moment? Or lacking sufficient identities? Say what you will about marketing and the ad industry, but it does seem like the various indie RPG subdivisions could use some rebranding...
But ya, as someone who does not do his own art and layout and also made a point of getting professional editing, all of that is expensive, even with a KS, and MRD certainly has made its money back and more, but ya for all the talk about how AI art is ruining RPGs, I prefer both aesthetically and principally to have original art, but that's a limiting factor on all of this as well tbh.
More than the cost, it's also just a lot of logistics and management, and while I've had a great relationship with all of my collaborators, sometimes it does feel like more meetings and other stuff like that that I'm already nearly burnt out with from work. If it were just writing and producing a work of art that would be one thing, but the business and logistic side of things is when it starts to feel like work (because it is...).